Ce qu'on ne sait pas sur le Japon - Page 1

You know what's kind of funny though? Some kids can't say "Good morning", but damn near all of them can ask if I have a big dick. Or, "bigu dikku" in Engrish.

It's called Kancho, and just about any kid can be a Kancho Assassin. Even the sweetest little girl may be prone to jam her fingers up your ass the second you turn around. This happened to one of my friends, which just goes to show - don't trust anyone. I'd say the little girls are the most dangerous cause they have natural ways of lowering your defenses.

I was on some Michael Flatley Lord of the Dodgedick shit

Anyway, we went out on a "date" once (just between friends...she has a boyfriend and at the time I had a girlfriend). During the date she was telling me about her boyfriend, so she showed me a picture she had on her cell phone. "Oh, he looks pretty cool." I said.

Her face turned completely serious, as she said "Not really. His head is too big." And I can't stress how serious she was here, as if this pained every waking minute of her life. To prove her point, she showed me another picture and said "Look! See? Way too big."

I already feel bad for this guy. I mean, nobody likes to get hit with break-up lines, but I can just see her one day coming to him and saying "I'm sorry, this just isn't going to work. Your head is too big."

Another time, we were talking about marriage or something, and I said "Well, you can marry your boyfriend, right?" She shook her head and said, "Maybe. But, if I marry my boyfriend..." Here she paused to think of how to say what she wanted to say in English, and in the interval my mind finished the sentence for her - "...our children will have big heads."
I'm not even sure of what she really said because I was too busy internally stifling my laughter.

One day the ichinensei were making skits to perform in English. I was walking around, checking the scripts, when one girl's script completely threw me off. She'd written "Hi! I'm ...... , the new English teacher. I like pain."

I stopped and asked her about this sentence. She explained that she didn't quite know how to spell "painting". Oh! Painting. Heh heh heh. Yes, that certainly makes sense. Painting is good.

She asked me what I thought she'd meant. I'm never telling.

Girl 2: Hey, we've got an English question...
Girl 1: But, he's not an English teacher...
Girl 2: But, he's still a teacher, and he had to have taken English in high school anyway, right? Let's ask.
Girl 1: Hey teacher, in English, "So this week is the Culture Festival?"...what's this mean?
Teacher: Hmm. Well. Let's see. "Culture...culture...culture..."
Girl 2: Ah, you're useless. Ok, you can move along.
Teacher: ...What? Girl 1: We mean, thank you very much.